Glancing at the aunts behind her, the eleven-year-old girl pushed on the exit door of the Old Country Buffet. The odors of warm and inviting food gave way to the crisp, invigorating scents of fall air and the brisk liveliness of the outdoors.Pronouncements of satisfaction and delight filled the air as the two older women relived their recent dessert experience and lovingly patted those body parts where those extra calories would soon gather.
"A moment on the lips; a lifetime on the hips."
This foreign adage fell on the little girl's ear and, after learning the meaning of that phrase, solemnly announced to the amused aunts that she didn't gain weight down there. Despite their comments to the contrary ("Just wait until you get older"), the little girl was quite positive she never would.
And the aunts laughed.
Well... that day was about... hmm... yes, well... a while back. And that little girl was I. I saw what older women looked like and where they put on extra poundage. After eleven years of deep experience and minimal weight gain, I was also equally sure I would NEVER look like that nor accumulate weight in my hips and derriere; NEVER!
Alas. As the years have passed, not only has the surplus of emergency reserve clung to my hips, it has also padded that which I sit upon, increased the circumference of my arms, added to my jawline, filled out my stomach, obscured my waist, and hidden the natural contours of my legs. To my chagrin, the aunts were right. Thus, from a childhood memory, a hackneyed phrase, and something I'd recently read, an insight was born.
How many times has the following happened to you? You're either on a diet, or have been doing SO well, and one day you mess up. How often do you throw the entire plan out the window? Become depressed? Despondent? What do you do when in the depths of dietary despair? Cry? Eat? Watch depressing chick flicks? Eat? Whine to your friends? Eat? Make new resolutions? Eat? Re-write your entire diet plan from the beginning? Eat?
Personally, my "excuse" to end any diet has always been to mess up just once, give up in despair, eat every yummy thing in sight, and sink into massive depression as I scroll through my mental slide-show of Svelte Me; tears streaming because I don't look like what I think I should look like... and never will. ::sigh::
Been there? I'm sure most of of us have been at this point at least once in our lives; at least once.
Okay. So you ate that Hershey's Kiss. Oops. You didn't work out at the gym today(!). Gasp. You ate the WHOLE cheesecake?! And what do you mean, there are 48 servings in that sheet of gooey carrot cake?! Are these reasons to give up on your weight-loss or fitness goal? Is any one of these a sufficient reason to get depressed and go on a week-long eating binge? Which of the above is the unpardonable sin that will forever separate you from thin bliss?
News flash. Just one mess-up is NOT going to ruin your life. And at the risk of puncturing self-pity bubbles and dismembering personal food fest plans, I shall state this again (this time in bold): Just one mistake is NOT going to ruin your life.
Switch your focus from the small to the large picture. Don't look at the mistake and fall into a vicious cycle of self-condemnation and self-loathing. Don't take your tear-stained cheeks to IHOP. Don't try to end all your good intentions by stuffing your head in the nearest cookie jar. Instead, admit you made a mistake, ask yourself (and whomever else) for forgiveness, and get right back on track.
Think objectively. If you suddenly snapped one late afternoon or evening and gobbled down a whole handful of chocolate or inhaled a slice of pizza or lost yourself in a glass of soda, yet everything else with your eating and exercise was fine - this was your only mistake - what would the damage be? Honestly, not that much!
From a physical/mathematical standpoint, what's the worst thing that just happened? Um... you ate an extra couple hundred calories. Do you realize that the average human burns 2000-2500 calories PER DAY; not including specific exercise! One larger-calorie meal in the midst of smaller meals will be treated by your body as an anomaly instead of the norm. Drink some extra water and maybe eat a little lighter the next meal... but don't give up and binge through the weekend.
Make sure your mistake doesn't turn a mistake of a few hundred calories into a several-thousand-calorie mistake! It's not worth it. By nipping your slip-up immediately, chances are you'll never see lasting side effects from your mistake.
The true price that tends to be paid with dieting "cheats" or "slip-ups" or mistakes is paid in emotions. The guilt we lay on ourselves is enormous; it does far more harm than we realize. Remember: the link between guilty depression and comfort eating is a fairly reliable one. So be prepared to fight.
Do yourself (and others) a favor - take a little responsibility and catch your mistakes while they are yet small and do it in a be-kind-to-yourself way. In so doing, you will keep them from ruining your life and will help you maintain self-control.
After all, real life is not like a regimented diet. The more self-control and moderation practiced throughout the assigned diet period, the more likely you will be able to take those skills and apply them to normal eating and living.
Think life change; not diet.
(photo courtesy of www.babble.com)
1 comment:
I had a similar experience in my own youth; for most of my adolescence (is that even really a stage?) I was beanpole thin. I think I weighed an average of 150, had weighed less so thought that was the biggested I'd ever get, and stayed that way until I was about 22.
It is a goodness you're commenting on this - I have had my own share of dieting scenarios where I'd be bigger than I'd like, try exercise or dieting, something would come up to trip me, and I'd use it as an excuse to quit.
Thanks for posting this - good stuff!
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